Momento Mori

I love dried flowers. 

They remind me that even an ugly process like death and decay, can result in something so beautiful. However, there is a right way to dry it though. You have to tilt them upside down so that it dries from bottom up. The flowers then retain some of their colour, faded away in a very majestic hue. 

Perhaps its the same for life for us I guess...our soul and identity being like water to the plant. And lets just say, the drying process is equivalent to ageing...once you give away too much of yourself and your identity slips away like water flowing out from the stem, you will wither away. Theres no colour. Just pure decay. When you look back to collect the fallen and wrinkled petals, you might not even recognise that piece of yourself. 

         You've lost it. 

                 Its no longer you. 

                              You've fallen            a  p      a            r         t. 

Influences.

Wearing: Top to toe Zara.

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Today's thoughts: 

When I hear people say "You're such a good influence..." I just think like, theres is no such thing as a good influence. What is an influence? Like...people look up to you and they want to be you be it in a good/ bad way? I feel that all influences are unethical. There should be no such thing. Don't say such things. Because to influence is to have a hold on someone. It is to give someone a part of your soul. She doesn't think her natural thoughts or let her own passions burn. Her moral decisions and goals are not real to her as compared to you. Her sins (if there are such things as sins) are borrowed from you, not her own. She becomes a rendition of someone else's music, an actress of a role that plays a part not meant for her. Heck, that part wasn't even written yet. 

The aim of life is self development. 

Question is: Can we say the same for inspiration though. 

Love and Loss

Dear Stranger,

whats your story. 

You've been on the phone,

with your face reading fury. 

Did you have a bad day,

or perhaps she called it off?

Did you lie or cheat,

or you found out that it was more than a cough?

Sorry, is all I can say,

though you're so far.

I hardly know you,

but I've probably been where you are. 

Agitated arms.

Frail body.

So much pale.

"fuck" you say, and stomped off in an outrage.

There there, I say.

From 20 metres away.

Dear Stranger, 

My thoughts are with you Tonight.

But remember in all things,

never give up without a fight. 

x

Sad Girls Club

*DRUMROLL*

preeeesenting to you, SAD GIRLS CLUB in TOKYO. 

My second exhibition overseas. I'm so excited can you feel my excitement. 

Here are some photos from behind the scenes during the set up at 3am in the morning. 

If you are within the vicinity, you can catch this at Daikanyama T-site 

I personally feel like they're all my friends or children. So this is like a graduation/ class photo you know, which is a very gratifying feeling for me. All of them were inspired by moments in my life or a sad person I met or a friend I know. So its like, I want to capture their/my sadness forever on fabric, stitch by stitch every inch of sadness and melancholy is trapped and embedded onto fabric. When I look at a piece, I remember all the negativity, its overwhelming but the colours and flowers usually juxtapose and masks it. Just like all of us, just like me.

And the most exciting thing about Sad Girls Club, is that it will keep growing. Heres my artist statement:

At this moment, I want to say a huge thank you to my Japanese agents and partners who stayed up all night to work on the layout of the exhibition. Thank you for having faith and representing my works. These photos were taken at like 3am ish okay. But I'm seriously thankful. This is so much.

Parasite

Things She would have told me: 

"Its okay", she said.

"Look at the plants, see how they grow? Some have the company of others but do not grow as tall as the ones who grow alone." 

"Which one are you?", she asked.

"The second. I feel alone sometimes. I feel alone today." I answered. 

"and thats okay...you know that right?" she said before turning to walk away, leaving me completely abandoned and alone. 

The best of you workshops

[ track to listen to now: Family- Catey Shaw] 

This song totally fits the mood I am in while writing this now haha

-

OMGGGGG

Its been such a wonderful week!!!

Tiring no doubt! BUT WHAT JOY, to be able to meet so many new faces and talk to so many fun personalities who shared and open up about their lives and the best of them. Once again, a huge thank you to all who came down, and the Julies team (esp Mr and Mrs Su and Tse Horng)  who put together this amazing exhibition and social movement. And holla to the guys at Kloo! Thank you for letting me be a part of this. Totally humbled and inspired. 

Here are some photos of the event. I'll be including a fb album link at the end of this post where you guys can either share or just grab the photos of your own work. xx 

My little assistant Riri San, who is so eager to help out on all 3 days. She can even teach you the stitches I taught her. So people'll be like "can you help to get the pink threads?" and she'll just run over to the other side of the table to grab them for you.

so as a reward for helping me, we had KFC. hehehehe.

and she made me a gift! I is touched and happy.

Thank you all for being a part of this amazing week with me. Must listen to the song okay. Really fits the mood. You can view the rest of the photos and download/grab the photos from this link. I've put it on public mode on fb so you may use or share this album. HERE  If you have any questions or anything at all, (or the link isn't working?? i hope not!!) just leave me a comment below. I will get back to you. xx

Morning Lesson.

Weakness has a smell. Like fear.
Its almost repulsive. Like olives.
No matter how hard you try to mask it, it reeks. To me at least.
And so you put up a front, of walls and pillars and strength laced with a fraction of humour and a tinge of cockiness.
The sweet scent of your attempt trying to surface, but all I smell is Weak Weak wEak weak WEAK.

well.
don't get too cocky. Never let me see you coming.
Thats the gaff, my friend.
Make yourself look small.
Be the Loser, the Cripple, the Outcast, the Nerd, the Leper, the Freak.

"look at me- i've been underestimated since day one"

and then, you win.
Question is: what then?

The Best Of You

HI GAIZ.

hows it going. I've had about the most craziest and the most exciting week all in one. One of the highlights of my week so far would definitely have to be the launch and opening of The Best Of You exhibition at Marina Square. 

Creeping around my work to see who's looking. hehehehe. 

So honoured to be able to be in the same frame as Mr and Mrs Su and Tze Horng. \^_^/ 

Hi everyone meet Riri San, she's so super cute I want to put her in my pocket. She doodled some flowers and trees for her mother because she is the best of her. 

and heres a picture of a dad, picking up embroidery for his daughter and meticulously embroidering a picture of a princess his daughter drew.

tadahhhhh. Here are some other works from the workshop!

Thanks all for coming down and being a part of this and sharing what the best of you is. I will be conducting two more days of workshops at Marina Square over the weekend. Its free for public, but you got to register in advance at The-best-of-you.com. COME SAY HI.

aaaaaand I'm out.
ciao.

Ka-o

Ka-o

"My impression is that she's very good natured. she's cheerful and considerate, so she's well received, but I still get the feeling that she's putting it on. Of course in this industry, everyone fakes it to some extent, but it seems to me that she's always forcing herself to be cheerful. Even her thoughtfulness is kind of painful to watch. 

She's pretty, but, how can I put it, its like she's afraid of living. I think she brings out the worst in people. Its like the part of her that's afraid, the part of her that's insecure, can't help accepting other people's weakness. It worries me to see that."

You found me

In my dreams you crept back,
go away feelings that I've put aside.
Tried to focus on a happy memory,
but there were few. Flowers still sit by my table, scent still alive.
I looked at the scars, a reminder of the hurt that I once knew.
They're disappearing, the wounds are healing, no don't let them disappear.
I claw and claw until they're raw again... to remember why I'm here.
To remember the red.
Mason jar of pale light, the sounds of weeping collected alongside with tears given birth from pure sadness and lost hope and desire.
In my dreams you crept back, in the dark hours you were here with me.
Go away, for I do not want you here.
Morning shall come and a new day will arise.
and gone you shall be.

You've hurt me enough.
Courage, whats that.
Pray tell.

Hanoi Day #1

 

Happy people are Happy, though we just had a bad experience with coconuts on this trip so far. I've been trying to order like a normal coconut, yknow the one you have to hack open and then casually throw a straw in to drink from? I WANNA DRINK SOME VIETNAMESE COCONUT JUICE. But so far whenever I say " hi, can i haz a coconut?" I get some weird coconut milk slushed ice drink. If you observe the picture above, the white colored drink that some of us ordered, remained untouched.

MY FAVOURITE DRINK IN HANOI. I have no idea what this is called. But it is amazing. (AND CHEAP! Only about SGD$1.40 per cup ) I first had it last time when I was in hanoi, maybe 2 years back or sth. But I can very vividly remember this place and how awesome this drink is, so I dragged everyone to come here to try. It is actually, lotus seed with some jelly pearl thingy, longan fruit and jasmine essence. Its suuuuuuuuuper refreshing. (but there were a lot of flies that flew in our drinks, so we had to scoop it out unless of course you want more dosage of protein in your drink then you leave it in there.)

And as you can see, we have also adopted a new friend Psy.

Some pages from my travel journal. I like to document things, because its soooo easy to forget small details like the taste of the food, the sights, the smell of things. I like to capture everything on paper in words or quick sketches before I forget.

--

Hanoi is really beautiful and magical. At least it feels that way to me. Can't wait for tomorrow... TEXTILE MARKET. *PLEASE* DONT BE A DISSAPOINTMENT LIKE THE COCONUT

Pumped up kicks

Hi October.

You're finally here. So many things lined up this month. I'm so excited. I never thought I'd make it to you in the beginning of the year. But here I am now. Just two more months and its the end of the year. Life is zooming by so quickly. Yikes. 

Line up of public events this month: 

11/10/14: Embroidery badge workshop at The General Company. You can sign up here. :D We'll be making embroidered badges! 

22/10, 25/10, 26/10: Embroidery workshop at "The Best Of You" Exhibition at Marina Square.

This is FREE for public, so come on down!! (limited places though) JOT THESE DATES DOWN NOWWWW :D

ok ciao. 

Where your treasure is

Walking along Barker road makes me extremely curious and inspired. I mean, HAVE YOU SEEN THE HOUSES THERE? The last picture is not even a house, it's a castle. It even has a tree house at the back.

Yknow sometimes it's so easy to get caught up in riches and big houses and luxury and just living the good life. I mean, my life now is not terrible, I live very comfortably but then I see these things and I'm like omggggg that house tho. What's it like to come home to a house like that, what's it like to drive a fancy car, what's it like to spend 800 on a dress? Then I get consumed in my thoughts and just roll my eyes upwards and let out a long sigh. 

But then I remember my parents always telling me to count my blessings. I have enough. I do. I should always remember that. Do not chase riches, always be contented with your life :) just a gentle reminder to anyone who's reading this :)  so........... I shall end with this post with a verse that goes like: 

Matthew 6:19-21

19 “Do not lay up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy and where thieves break in and steal, 20 but lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust destroys and where thieves do not break in and steal. 21 For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also

Xx

Baby Don't Cry

drip drip drop. Embroidered details on canvas. 

-

All of your words, they've been cursed with dishonesty.

Take it from the girl you claim to love. 

-

I really enjoyed doing this piece. I've haven't painted since like....4 years ago? I love painting now, the way the brush strokes the canvas...the sound it makes when it drags the paint across the weaves. The way your wrist flicks and curves to make a angled stroke. Using different mediums that Im not so accustomed to, makes me think differently too. Like...how to blend the colours, how to create the shadows while the paint is still wet. 

My favourite part of this, is of course the embroidery. I love embroidery so much I can't even begin to explain the kind of peace and serenity it brings to me. I can embroider FOREVER. I love the way the threads come together, the sound it makes when the needle passes through the canvas/fabric...i think it makes this sound: ffsshh, ffshh. fshhh. HHAHAH. 

okok. 

This is going up on my high ceiling wall along the stair case. Slowly filling it up with works. Cant wait to fill it up. Half of it is gone because I took down a lot of my embroidered works to ship to Tokyo for an exhibition. THAT, is also very exciting. I can't wait to share it.

for now. I'm gonna crash. I have a meeting at 930am tmrw. *insert face of pain*