Tuesday, April 28, 2015

Grandma's 88th

My grandmother turns 88 this year. She inspires me and I want to grow old the way she did. Strong, and without fear. Happy birthday popo, I love you :)

also, totally irrelevant, BUT if you look closely at the first picture, you will notice that my brother has unbuttoned his shirt to expose his over expanded stomach from over gouging on  Dim Sum, which is a point I also want to make which is not to over order especially when you're hungry. 

Have a lovely week! :) 

Monday, April 20, 2015

Birthday Love and Spectacles Situation


This week has been so entirely busy I don't even know where to start. But I'm so glad that its over, this week would be such a chill and relaxed week IM GLAD! :D How is everyone, thank you for visiting my blog. Bless you child. What is happening now? How was your week? The only highlight of my week was my friend's Avril's birthday! It was a surprise party and I love surprise parties because I get to anticipate the person arriving and it makes me squeal with excitement i can't sit still like omgomgomg is she here yet OMG SHES HERE. 

But here she is! Beautiful Avril with my birthday gift of 1000000 cute panties for a lawyer. 

It was such a fun night!

Also, totally random, but you might be wondering why am I wearing spectacles when I wear contact lenses. I wear colored contacts btw but my prescription degree is +4.75. However I am only wearing contact lenses with prescription degree of +4.00. Hence sometimes I wear spects over my contact lenses. Also, you must be thinking "why can't you just wear contact lenses of +4.75 degree then!" well the answer would be because I like the option of wearing spectacles on and off! And also if I were to answer you in ONE word it would be: Vanity.

there! Im not complaining, and I can't complain because I get wonderful sponsors who sponsor my eye wears which makes me so so so so super happy (and vain)  hehehehehehe.

Ok I digress! Want to know a funny story? I was wearing my spectacles today on the train because I was reading and there was a nice looking guy seated opposite me. For some reason, I thought I was wearing my shades so I looked up and stared at him thinking like "what a hottie..." and for some strange reason, he was staring right straight at me!?!? like OMG? So I was thinking like "hmm, thankful for these shades, I don't think he realises that Im staring straight at him. *squints eyes*" and he was like *squints + frowns eyes* in a way that it meant to say "WHY ARE YOU STARING AT ME IN SUCH A CREEPY WAY?!" and at that moment, I suddenly realised I was NOT wearing shades and I was SO embarrassed. I don't even know how to salvage the situation. I just pretended I was deep in thought and spacing out in his direction before looking back at my book.

*twiddles thumbs*

Monday, April 13, 2015

Thoughts before Sleep

I am most afraid and anxious before sleeping. 

Needing to face my thoughts alone in the darkness and quietness scares me...and this quietness and stillness are the same duo that liberates me from anxiety. I think about you (the black), about you (the white), about you (the lost), about you (the present). The silence is almost deafening alongside with the whiteness of still air against my beating heart. 

heart beat one
heart beat two
heart beat three
heart beat four

Dante, Oh Dante, perhaps this is what you meant when you said to remember tonight...for it is the beginning of always

heart beat five
heart beat six

Friday, April 10, 2015


Perfect blue skies today.
Stacey you must be happy,
We're just one more month shy from May. 

blue hues and stacey

You heard Stacey's voice in the crowd, you turned but alls just a sea of faces. You're not sure who Stacey is, what colour hair she has, how far apart her eyes are, her face shape...you don't know anything about Stacey but you recognise her voice. You're sure its her. You slow down and wait for that voice to pass by your right ear in hopes that you can identify Stacey... to finally see her face, to put a face to the name, to her voice.

The rush hour crowd.

Push Push Push. You look back as the crowd pushes on and you strain your ears to listen.

Your phone rings.
You put it to your ear
and she goes "hi teresa, its stacey.

lovely hues in the sky, 
stacey must be saying hi. 
blue hues on the floor,
stacey, stop, please, no more. 
blue hues for tea,
Stacey, let go and be free. 

Thursday, April 9, 2015

In all honesty...

This morning I want to write about this space and my water bottle.

There were many times this week when I wanted to type and type and type about my thoughts here but I'm starting to feel like I shouldn't. I used to feel free, like I can say anything I want and its ok, I started out this blog having only like 5 views a day at most...and I felt comfortable with that because its like a shared world...like I don't know who you are but you're reading my words...even if its just one person reading my words everyday, I feel that sense of wanting to share. Like a secret friend kinda thing. 

So now, because of all the publicity for my works which I am eternally grateful for btw, my blog hits crazy numbers everyday...I get really scared by the numbers. I feel awkward, like...how I would be in a large room of people, or like a party. Sometimes I wish I could be a water bottle on the table. So anyway let me digress a little, I was at a house party and everyone was just mingling, I mean...yeah I can do that too but sometimes it gets very emotionally draining for me to just switch and talk to so many people, so I was just staring at the kitchen table and I saw a water bottle just sitting so calmly in the middle of the chaos. SO, I went to join the water bottle, and we observed the party going by... before a really drunk girl came up to me and started crying because she said she loves my hair. 

So anyway, what I'm saying is that, I realised I don't know how to deal with the audience. I don't know how bloggers do that...I'm not even saying I'm famous or even popular. I am not. Its just this sudden ability to influence people in the words I say or the things I post up...I'm like...damn...I don't know how to do this...I'm afraid to say the wrong things, or do the wrong things, or I have to be more careful now...or maybe I shouldn't post too many selfies!? 

Btw, I totally took the water bottle from the kitchen at the house party that I went to (I asked the host if I could have it! I didn't steal it! He def gave me a weird look but he said if I wanted it, I could have it!), so now we face chaos together. Just me, and my water bottle.