daylight.

What a gruelling night seriously.

If you were to ask me, whats one most painful and unbearable thing in my entire life...I would tell you that I hate vomiting and any stomach related pain. And  I would say that my pain tolerance is actually quite high, but one thing I cannot take, is vomiting.  Last night I had another episode of food poisoning, I spent the whole night (well almost all of it) in the toilet. But the thing about pain and unbearable situations, is that it makes you suddenly think about the relativity of life. Suddenly, your priorities are clear, suddenly you're all like "I wont do this again, I promise", suddenly you're helpless.

Who should I call? What should I do? I'm in so much pain even if I'm at  the hospital I have to wait for my turn. The pain was really unbearable, I can't imagine going through another hour of this. I called out to God out of desperation. SAVEEEEE MEEEEEE. I can't go through another episode. (I was literally in tears btw, because I hate and dread going through this so much) So imagine me, crying alone in the middle of the night feeling sick as hell, at that point of time I felt that the only person that could help me must be some higher being, God himself. I prayed a very simple prayer and depended fully on Him and trusted with all my heart that in His mercy and love that He will take away this pain.

And you know what, almost immediately after that I had this huge surge of nausea, like my stomach did a huge flip and I vomited out this huge chunk of everything...some thing like a purge. Everything came out and I just slumped down on the floor in exhaustion. I sat there for awhile, in case another wave comes, but that was it. The unbearable pain was gone, and nausea stopped.

I washed up and went to sleep at about 4am after everything, exhausted and weak. While I was lying on my bed, hands on my stomach, I was like..wow suddenly work doesn't matter to me, emails don't matter to me, certain issues with people don't matter to me anymore, material goods don't matter to me. Suddenly I could see things in clearer perspective. Less worldly.  In such pain and discomfort, you suddenly realise that nothing in this world matters anymore but your soul and spiritual life. This feels so surreal to me because I've had countless episodes of food poisoning and stomach issues, so I know the symptoms very well so I know that yesterday's episode and immediate healing was really a miracle. Yesterday night could have ended being hospitalised as usual, but I choose to believe that my God healed me because I believed without a doubt that He would.

and with this deep immense love covering me, I fell into deep sleep.